This website is operated by a single individual for the benefit of that individual. It is not for the public's use in any way, shape or form. Simply looking at this text constitutes your consent to monitoring as well as harsh commentary about your web browsing habits being made at future cocktail parties. Your continued reading of this text constitutes your consent to being stalked over a period of months for purposes unknown, and to the use of your personal residence as a testing area for ill-advised experimentation in fields of scientific research best left unmentioned. Things only go downhill from here. Go away.

TL;DR version: Piss off.